TODAY IS A BIG DAY!!!

I'm going to Austin. Though I'm "moving" there, I am only taking a 2 suitcases. It's kind of hard to pack for an undetermined amount of time, especially when most of your clothes doesn't really fit. Its hard too to guesstimate if what clothes will continue to fit in the coming months too.

If I think back on when I was packing for Panama, I took 2 suitcases with me for a 2 year trip. Now, how can I take more than that if we plan on moving back within a 2 year period?

There are some "homey" things I want to take with me but are unsure of where we are going to live and when we are coming back, so I guess for now, they'll have to stay here at my parents house...ha ha, that sounds funny.

Well this morning is my last breakfast at HOME with mommy, daddy, Manuela, and snoopy! Chocolate chip pancakes, eggs with tomatoes and onions, and fruits---Happy tummies!

Dinner tonight will be in Austin with Peter!!

The world we live in...

What kind of world are we living in that Priests are congratulating me for keeping my baby.
Yesterday I went to talk to Fr. Willie at Belen. Peter and I had a couple questions on the actual process of getting married..since niehter of us have any idea...hahaha. We talked about what the Church as an institution recommends and then we talked about what he personally recommended that we do.

In the midst of that conversation, he said: "Though out of the prefered order, I am very proud that you kept the baby." I didn't know what to say. What has this world turned into that the expected is for someone my age to "get rid" or "not keep" her baby...the expected even by the religious members of the community.

I wanted to say Thank you, but all I could do was force a smile out. I don't think that I deserve him to be PROUD of me something that I should be doing. I think back on school and remember when friends would get good grades, their parents would reward them with gifts that started as toys and escalated to cars toward high school. I always asked my parents why I never got any gifts for getting good grades or for my good behavior...they would always answer, because that is what you SHOULD be doing.

We can't change the world we are living in right now, but maybe, just maybe, there is a slight chance that we can change the direction in which the world is going. This new step for Peter and I isn't going to be easy but i'm sure that if God brings you to it, he'll bring you through it...and much stronger on the other side. Maybe through our experience, some of our friends, and the little part of the world that we affect, can start seeing the change in the world that we want for our baby to live in

Decisions, decisions...

With the Huge list of THINGS TO DO, and numerous unknowns in our lives right now, it has been extremely difficult to decide almost ANYTHING.

As of right now, I'm on the 21st week of being pregnant. That officially means that I'm more than half way through this process. The weeks are creeping by on us. Before we know it, I'll be giving birth somewhere (Austin or Miami). With the speed at which the weeks are going by, I fear that the last 4 months of the pregnancy might be lost in the commotion of planning other things. If only the world could be put on hold while Peter and I get to live these next months together, then we could resume with all the decision-making and not miss out on any more of this time. Yet, we are all aware that life doesn't give you the option of PAUSE, REWIND, FAST FORWARD, or STOP. Life's only option is PLAY and so we must keep living and adjusting accordingly, not forgetting that the most important thing in our lives right now is this baby's health.

Sometimes I worry that I should be doing things differently, but then I think back on the words of Dr. Carbone in Panama: Keep doing everything normally, you don't have a Condition or an Illness, you're just pregnant. The first 4 months went by so smoothly that I didn't even notice I was pregnant, so we can't begin to change too much now.

The women that I met and worked with in Santana would work normally out in the fields and would do their daily activities almost til the time they were ready to give birth. At that time they didn't rush to hospitals or doctors, they stayed home, and would have their babies there.
I'm not saying that this is what I'M going to do, but it's comforting in a weird way to know that babies can be born safely and healthily without any special care. I am grateful and glad that we will be able to provide special attention and care for our baby. It is a privilege that a lot of people in the world can't afford and don't even dream of.

First Entry!

Hello Everyone!

I've been keeping a blog for the last couple months of my experiences in Panama with the Peace Corps. Blogging was not only theraputic but a great way to share my experiences abroad with all my friends and family. It has also been a great way to track the memories and both the big and small events that impacted me throughout my time away.

I have ended my service in Panama due to some life changing news!

A couple weeks ago I found out I was 18 weeks pregnant with a baby boy. After finding out the news, everything changed. I spoke with the Peace Corps Medical Staff to find out what the process was to get Medically Seperated. With the help of my parents who were both in Panama, I went into my community and told them the news and that I had to leave them earlier than I had promised. They were all upset but kneew that I wasn't leaving because I didn't like it there, but because I was carrying a baby. They even started coming up with nicknames for the baby like: Hojaldra, mamon, and patacon.

Leaving Princesa, caramelo, and the community was one of the hardest things i've done in the later part of my life. But as I did it, I knew that I would come back with Peter and our baby. I know that when they do come back, they will be amazed at what the baby and I did during the first months of his life.

I left one life behind to come start a new one with Peter. I came home to Miami to meet family and friends who welcomed us home with excitement.

He then surprised me with a trip to Puerto Rico. I thought is was a little get-away for the two of us since we hadn't seen eachother in 4+ months, but his true intentions of the trip were revealed when he proposed with a beautiful dimond ring on the beach at sunset, WHILE HORSEBACK-RIDING!! We spent some time in Vieques wandering the empty beaches, soaking in the sun, and just being. Our trip ended with a whirlwind visit to Ponce, across the Island, where we met up with Leilani.

When we got back to Miami, our parents surprised us with an Engagement Dinner Party with all our friends and family members. Definitly an emotional night.

The next couple months will be everything but NORMAL! But Peter and I are mentally preparing ourselves to, as Montalvo ( my cross-country coach in High School would always say) Expect the unexpected. There is a lot we need to do and learn in the coming months but we're taking life one step at a time right now.

We hope you enjoy this blog as much as we will enjoy having it.

Today is a very important day as well cause...it's Daddy Flores' Birthday!
Happy Birthday Peter! Hope you have a great Day!